Thursday, February 7, 2013

Something Looks Very, Very Wrong

Let's play a game. Games are fun! Games that allow you to laugh at other people (in this case, me) are even more fun than games where you do poorly and stalk off in a huff, or overturn the board, or shout at other players. I am not thinking of anyone specific.

Back to the game at hand. It's called "Can You Guess What THIS Is Supposed to Be?" Please see the picture below:

Take your time; this is hard. 
Okay, it was such a marvel, I took numerous pictures. Here's one with a wee Squeaky lookalike popped in. I don't know if it will help you identify the Mystery Object, but it amused me:

"Don't eat me!" (As IF.)
This next shot may give it away:


Got it yet? If you guessed, with some bewilderment, "Cupcakes? Good God, are those supposed to be CUPCAKES?" then you are absolutely right! And that is exactly what *I* said when I opened the oven door last night to reveal what I have since named "Crater Cupcakes." This recipe is from the Swank Diet book. That comment is not meant to malign the Swank Diet book. With one exception, all of the Swank recipes have been good. Rather, it's meant to illustrate that on this diet, you can eat yummy sweets; you just have to know how to follow a recipe. I've retraced my steps and am nearly positive I added all of the necessary ingredients, including baking powder. If anyone has a clue why the above would happen, I'm all ears!

The burning question is: did I toss them straight into the trash? Certainly not! I haven't had anything resembling chocolate since December. I gobbled one in straightaway (as did my husband), and they tasted mighty fine, crater or no crater. (Yes, I removed Wee Squeaky before I commenced shoveling them in my mouth.) In fact, on my shopping list: fat-free frozen yogurt to pop right into those craters, which I will warm in the microwave first.

Here they sit in their container, ready to be attacked after dinner. (Note attention-seeking Wee Squeaky lurking in the background.)
To prove that I can follow recipes and make edible-looking things, below are two other items that I made last night (both also from the Swank Diet book). Behold the Skillet Scallops!


I wish you could have heard me trumpeting, "Behold the Skillet Scallops!" FOUR separate times as I attempted to rotate this picture. Finally, I got sick of hearing myself trumpet and gave up. So, there, above, are the sideways Skillet Scallops. They still look pretty good, don't they? And, another triumph (fingers crossed for proper photo alignment): CORNBREAD!

"Hey! Where's the crater?"
Ah ha! Success! (Both the recipe and the photo.) We ate very well last night, the appearance of the Crater Cupcakes notwithstanding.

For those of you wondering -- and I know you're out there -- yes, I did wash Wee Squeaky, both pre- and post-food posing.

18 comments:

  1. I think it all looks delicious. And, your muffins are merely glorious in their individuality. Nothing wrong with that. I say, trumpet away! But as far as solving the mystery, maybe your baking powder has expired--did you check the date on the can? And are you sure you used powder (in a can, probably a red one) as opposed to soda (orange box)?

    P.S. Attention-seeking Wee Squeaky made me laugh. I can relate.

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    1. Why thanks, Amy! Count on me serving them at our next party!

      I did check the exp. date on the baking powder (and was sure to check that it was powder, not soda -- I experienced *that* debacle with a different recipe). I guess this will remain a Mystery for the Ages.

      If you are ever in need of attention, Attention-Seeking Wee Squeaky has plenty to spare. She's giving me plenty now as her dinner time approaches.

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  2. Dude weird recipe for cupcakes. have never see anything like that!

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    1. Could they have imploded because I beat the batter for too long? I set the food processor and left it for a couple of minutes. The batter was very thick and fluffy.

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  3. I want a Wee Squeaky!! I also want my blinking annoying Wordpress ID comment thingie to work properly. I even tried signing up to Google ID, but they won't let me use Stumbling In Flats as a name, meh.
    Anyway, glad diet going well. I'm trying the 5:2 Fast Diet, only because I'm a lazy mare and can stuff my face five days out of seven, woo hoo!!
    Amazingly, I have lost 5 pounds in 4 weeks. Bonkers.
    X
    p.s. thank you to Squeaky for making me laugh out loud!!
    www.stumblinginflats.com

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    1. I'm so sorry for the Wordpress fiasco! I promise I haven't set it so that you cannot use your ID and lure my readers to your very funny blog. HAHAHA. If only I had such skills...and a lurable army of readers!

      What is the 5:2 Fast Diet? Congrats on losing weight; I really doubt you are a mare, but it made me laugh.

      Squeaky says you are quite welcome for the laugh and would I PLEASE FEED HER RIGHT NOW?

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  4. I love the Swank Eruptions. And, if they taste good, how they look is a secondary issue - besides now you have an excuse to fill them with yummy yoghurt.

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    1. Swank Eruptions; how very disgusting that sounds! It's far too tempting to take that down a poo-related path, so I will prove I am not a 12-year-old boy and refrain from further comment.

      I will report back on the yummyness that is sure to be Swank Eruptions with Fat Free Yogurt!

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  5. I know who you are thinking about. The person-who-you-wish-was-not-your-sister. Wait til you see me next, GIANORMOUS CHEEZE PIZZA in hand & mouth. MMMM, MMMM! Then you'll REALLY wish I wnys!

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    1. Haha! You are right *this* time; I was thinking of you! All in good fun, of course.

      Yes, I'm already bracing for the you-shoveling-in-pizza event that's bound to come. (You'll secretly be jealous of my oh-so wholesome CHEESELESS variety!) As long as you don't shout, "Cool and refreshing!" while you eat it -- like you used to do while being the first to finish her glass of milk while I let mine languish and get warm on the dining room table, hoping it would vanish somehow -- I won't get too sulky.

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  6. If they taste good, then don't worry. I too think they would be yummy with yogurt! A couple of reasons they may not have turned out, oven temperature was too low when you put them, they were overmixed, or you have old baking powder. Gosh that scallop dish looks delicious, as does the cornbread. Now I'm hungry!

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    1. I'm guessing "overmixed." The oven definitely wasn't too cool, because I had just made the cornbread; if anything, the oven was too hot, because the bread required a higher temp (although I did adjust the levels down before baking the cupcakes). I checked expiration dates, so I guess I'll mix them less next time. They still taste good, but the consistency is more brownielike than cupcakelike -- perfect for pairing with yogurt!

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  7. KLC guessed that they were some sort of treat that just lacked the Hershey's kiss in the middle as a finishing touch. Would Dr S permit that?

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    1. Grievously, no, unless Hershey's makes a fat-free variety. :(

      But I think a clump of "ice cream" (aka Turkey Hill FF frozen yogurt, which is really good) will be a nice addition.

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  8. Thankfuly you saved the crater cakes. Somewhere in the world, there are hungry children who would enjoy making fun of your baking skills!
    Keep cooking.

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    1. Ha! Good one!

      I will keep cooking and posting the good/bad results. (The latter for the children, of course.)

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  9. Keep us posted! I used to have my own vegan cupcake business. The cakes I made were Swank friendly which was how I got into it in the first place. Was the recipe you used the Chocolate Cupcake one? The amount of baking powder asked for in the recipe sounds suspect. 3 tbl is a HUGE amount. They must have meant 3 tsp (though even that is still a big amount). I'm gonna have a go, and see if I can come up with a Swank friendly chocolate cupcake using one of my old recipes....

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    1. Chloe, yes, it was the Easy (Quick?) Chocolate Cupcakes recipe. I've tried them now three times -- even with a brand-new can of baking powder -- with no luck. Two of the three times they tasted good, so that's something! Plus, as I suspected, the heaps of vanilla FF yogurt helped a lot.

      Not one to be daunted, I will try again (with less BP), but I'm very interested to know how yours turn out. How cool that you had a vegan cupcake business!! I'd have been a regular, assuming I, you know, lived anywhere remotely close to you!

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